So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
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