I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
