shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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