So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
