You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize