We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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