and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize