I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
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It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
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And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
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