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I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
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