it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
it was like his penis was on wheels.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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