Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize