Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
