I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
