it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Randomize
