you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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