i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I'm gonna fight the coyote
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
