You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Text me some of your sweat
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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