What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
