'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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