My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
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