She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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