Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Randomize