What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize
