:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
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