it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Randomize
