i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Randomize