just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
