do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize
