grandma shit on top of the toilet
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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