we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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