Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize