His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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