It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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