I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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