I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
