brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Randomize