Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Randomize
