Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Dicks are not precious.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
