Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
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