I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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