She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Randomize
