I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
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