we made out on top of his cat.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize