its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Randomize
