she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Randomize
