and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
