I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
