Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize