I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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