When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
