I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize